by Brian Wagenaar | May 31, 2022 | Satire
By Alfonso Tortellini After years of student complaints about the nutrition, taste, and financial value of campus meals,the university has decided to make the switch to a new feeding system designed to properly satiate Western students. In a statement, new French food... 
by Brian Wagenaar | May 31, 2022 | Satire
By Mary Debutante Across Western’s campus, faculty, staff, and students have become fed-up with a glaring inefficiency: excessive, endless, and often counterproductive meetings. Whether virtual, in person, or hybrid, excessive meetings have become a scourge across... 
by Brian Wagenaar | May 31, 2022 | Satire
By Joe Montanya Western administrators have released an official statement indicating their plans to initiate thefinal in a long series of rebrands and name alterations. Indeed, the rumors are true, Western Colorado University, pending final state approval, will... 
by Brian Wagenaar | May 31, 2022 | Satire
By Perry Shredson Jr. Gnar, redefined Undergraduate students from Western’s Clark Family School of Environment and Sustainability (ENVS) banded together this week to build a gigantic compost pile (new dirt, for the environmentally uninitiated) in the center of campus...